The following was written during my conversion process and focuses on the Peoplehood aspect of conversion.

Conversion to Judaism is something unique, interesting, and most
enigmatic to the average non-Jew. I actually feel that the term
conversion is misleading and over the past year and a half I’ve come to
think of it less as conversion and more as “Joining the Tribe”.

Conversion in other religious traditions is much more about personal
choice, for example, from a Christian point of view it’s about wanting
to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, or in Buddhism it is
a commitment to follow the teachings of the Buddha, and is more of a
personal decision that one can do independent of others, should they
choose to.

Having said that I’m sure that there are those who would disagree,
but it’s been my experience at least with most religions the conversion
process is about personal salvation or emancipation, and anything else
is a distant second to the primary reason.

Judaism is different from most others in this regard, for example
where Christianity claims that salvation is only available through
Jesus Christ, Judaism goes out of its way to make it clear that you
don’t need to be Jewish to be a good or righteous person, nor is
Judaism a prerequisite to God or Heaven.

Becoming a Jew is about recognizing God and Torah but requires more
than just these two ingredients, it’s about joining a family, it’s
about joining a tribe, it’s about joining a peoplehood.

The truth of it is that from a Jewish perspective (as I understand
it) one can accept God and live a righteous life through the Torah with
no need of becoming a Jew or joining the tribe.

So accepting God and Torah can lead to righteous living, but does not necessarily equal becoming a Jew.

As I see it, what makes a person a potential Jew is an overwhelming
desire to join the tribe and become part of the family and in doing so
learning to live in this world as a Jew. This joining of the tribe is
very much like immigrating to a new land, both literally and
spiritually and requires more than just a desire. It requires that a
convert not only learn and study, but also demonstrate that he or she
is able to live life in a Jewish fashion.

If one’s motivations for exploring Judaism are purely spiritual and
about one’s personal relationship with God, you might find that
conversion is not required, and in fact may not even be a good idea for
you.

I know that this notion of spiritual motivation being separate from
the issue of conversion is difficult and one that I had a hard time
with initially. Actually I think it’s something many people who are
coming to this conversion process as single independent adults have a
hard time with.

The idea of peoplehood as being part of a spiritual tradition is
very different for most Westerners and so many of us come to the
conversion process with ideas that may be incomplete, or not
necessarily the best fit with becoming a Jew. I am not suggesting that
people shouldn’t seek to convert but rather that there may be some
difficult issues, which will need to be worked through. I can say that
this has certainly been the case with me.

From a personal perspective, I now see how I came to this process
with my spiritual agenda being placed before the idea of Peoplehood and
that just doesn’t work. I’ve noticed others similar to myself, who
early on in the conversion process, struggled with how to express their
own sense of Jewishness or how to get Judaism to align itself with
their own view of what it should and should not be. It may sound
ridiculous reading it here, but trust me it does happen, and I myself
have engaged in such thinking and behaviors.

Looking back, I see that it’s really a ridiculous and futile thing
to attempt, for example can you imagine moving to a country like
Canada, but trying to pick and choose which cultural aspects and laws
you will live by, and also expect the natives to abide by the same
ideas.

Of course there is room for diversity, but when you move to Canada
there’s an expectation that you will blend into the culture as well as
respect and abide by its laws. I see converting to Judaism as being
similar in that it is a living cultural entity, one that has existed to
its credit, without a homeland for most of the last 3000 years. Judaism
is so much more than a religion; it is a phenomenal nation of people
both inside and outside of Israel. At its best, Judaism has been one
of the most positive and powerful influences in on Western culture and
despite its hardships has outlasted every other western civilized
nation. Again this is no small feat considering much of this time the
Jews were wandering without a home and often under threat of
destruction.

Although I think it’s understandable that many who come to the
conversion process, do so out of a questioning desire to get straight
with God or in seeking some sort of sustenance from the peoplehood, but
an equally if not more important question is, ” What do I have to offer
to the Tribe?” This is an extremely important, but often overlooked
(by those seeking to convert) aspect of conversion and is in my opinion
and essential part of the process.

It’s important because the questioning desire to get straight with
God or to extract sustenance from the peoplehood on a spiritual level
does not require membership, in fact in many ways it is much easier
because there’s less responsibility and expectation placed on non-Jews
by the Peoplehood.

Really in many ways becoming a Jew means full responsibility and
participation and that has an upside, like this phenomenal sense of
kinship I’ve never seen anywhere else, but it also has its downside. It
means taking on the responsibility of acting appropriately in the world
as a Jew, not only in the eyes of God, but in the eyes of your
respective community. It also means excepting the burdens of being part
of the tribe, including anti-Semitism and the soft prejudices that go
on every day. You may be thinking not in modern-day North America but
trust me, I’m not even a Jew, yet the fact that I wear a Kippah most
days has already led to a few uncomfortable situations.

There’s no way to be a Jew and take on only the spiritual blessings
of the Jewish life without also taking on many of the problems and
baggage associated with being part of the peoplehood. So it is
important to move past thinking only about what you can get from it but
also, to give as much or more thought to how you will be able to handle
this other side of things. People will treat you different, often times
this difference will be respectful and positive, but not always.

Coming back to the idea of contribution, looking at it with the
above information in mind, can you see why it’s important to think
about what you have to contribute? Can you see why it’s important that
the Jews also see it?

Ultimately conversion is not only a decision on the part of a
candidate, but is also something that must be affirmed by the community
of Jews who the candidate is studying with. You see it’s about becoming
family, and it’s not just about what the candidate gets out of
“Judaism”, it is equally important that everyone think about and
understand what can this person bring to the peoplehood.

For better or for worse, as people seeking to convert and join the
tribe we really need to be super Jews in many ways. At first I was
uncomfortable with this thought and actually found it to be
discriminatory, but the more I study and deepen my understanding, the
more I accept this is the way it should be.

Assimilation of Jews into non-Jewish culture and society is an
ongoing issue, and something that could well impact, Judaism’s ability
to survive as a peoplehood. Because of this it makes no sense to except
people into the tribe who are not going to strengthen it both
culturally and spiritually, affirming its traditions and infusing it
with fresh energy.

Again I’m looking at this from the point of view of a single young
adult with their whole life ahead of them, and who is seeking
conversion. I think things would be different for those who are in
intermarriage and are converting to Judaism, but this is not what I’m
looking at.

So for those who are like us, single and with our lives ahead of us a community has to look at the long term (as do we).

As a potential convert are you prepared to raise any future children
in a Jewish home? Are you prepared to marry a Jewish spouse, and if
not have the spouse convert and live life Jewishly?

Are you ready to put the Jewish traditions and cultures ahead of those from your own upbringing?

Are you prepared to deal with what that means in terms of your family and friends?

What about Israel, do you understand the significance of Israel and are you ready to support it?

When you run into situations that are uncomfortable from a Jewish
perspective are you going to hide being Jewish or are you willing to
assert yourself respectfully but in a way that defends the tribe?

These are not profiling questions; they’re just important ones that
will help ensure long-term success living life as a Jew. They are
questions to be considered for our own interest as well is that of the
tribe and if we aren’t prepared or are unable to answer these questions
than in my opinion, we are not ready to become Jews.

Becoming a Jew is not something you can do alone and living life as
a Jew is not something you can do alone and this makes conversion into
Judaism different than any other form of religious conversion.

So I suppose, in conclusion, it’s likely that what brought us to
Judaism as a person interested in conversion is not going to be enough
on its own to make us a good Jew or even accepted into the tribe.

I came to Judaism, trying to figure out what it could do for me but
as I get closer to the end of the conversion process, I have become
more concerned with what I bring to Judaism and how to best participate
and contribute to the tribe.

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